I wish I knew how to quit you, soda

Wow, has it been four months? Yes, yes it has. It even feels like it’s been four months since my last blog update. I know exactly why I haven’t been updating as well. There is no part of this that is not a surprise to me. I was not “caught off guard”, and I haven’t been “extremely busy”. I’d apologize, but I’m not actually sorry, and not that many people read this thing anyways (most who do got dragged in from one of my movie reviews or unfunny rants about media stuff).

This is not a blog update about blog updating or the lack thereof, however. There is plenty of time for that. Today’s update is to put into words my constant struggle with wanting to consume copious amounts of carbonated sugary love.

Oh my GOD I love soda so much.  So very very much. It’s delicious and makes me feel better and I just want it pretty much all the time. And it’s everywhere and it’s so cheap.

But I have to give it up. The rush might be nice, but the net result is me being sluggish. It makes me feel bloated, and the visual evidence makes it very clear that it’s also making me actual fat. These are not things I want to have to deal with now that I’m re-entering the running world (let’s be honest I need all the help I can get in that department). This gut of mine is a soda gut, and I’m probably on the fast track to Type 2 Diabetes.

And let’s be perfectly clear: if my sugar habit gets to the point where my ability to process glucose is compromised, I will die very soon thereafter.

This is not the first time I’ve tried curbing this addiction. I’ve tried just drinking in moderation, but it is way too easy to justify more and more and more (especially with self-serving soda machines). I’ve given it up for Lent, but Lent doesn’t last forever (and the last time I gave it up I couldn’t even stick with it for the full 40 days). Cold turkey is really the only solution. It just so happens it is also the most painful one. Did I mention my fixation on the stuff earlier? Because DAMN I want some. Like literally right now I want to go downstairs and pay a full $1 for a can of Dr Pepper (that’s right, I am such a fan of the stuff that I know not to add a period after the Dr part).

I mean, I grew up on the stuff. Almost without exception, we drank root beer with pizza, I always got a Dr Pepper from the vending machine at the oyster farm, and back when Super Size was still a thing you could get at McDonald’s, guess what I always got when eating dinner with my cousins? I kind of miss that giant bucket of fries we used to get too.

One of my friends suggested seltzer water, maybe with some juice in it or something, but I don’t know. I’ve tried seltzer before, and it’s just a strange thing to drink soda without the sugar or flavor. I’m pretty sure I can actually taste the carbon dioxide, and it’s not pleasant.

So it’s just a weird and obnoxious thing I have to do now.  Or, rather, a wonderful thing I have to not do anymore. Just not drink soda anymore. I don’t know if I’ll stay strong, or if I’ll break down and drink some eventually. But, well, here it goes.

Please try not to drink any around me.

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